Attention=Devotion
Breaking Habits That Become Addictions
The captain and his yerba mate station
Everywhere you go in Argentina, you see people drinking mate. In this region of the world, yerba mate is more than just a drink; it’s a way of life. Take a walk in the park and you’ll see groups of people passing around a mate, the round gourd that’s used to drink the tea. Never far from one’s reach is a thermos of hot water to add to the mate, which can be refilled at any gas station or convenience store. People literally consume mate all day long. It’s a part of the culture, and you’d be considered quite rude if you turn down someone’s offer of mate. But on the other hand, people don’t just share mate with anyone. As an Argentinian explained to me, it’s a ritual that’s shared between close friends and family. And it’s not only reserved for adults; you’ll find babies sucking on the bombilla, too! (Bombilla is the silver straw-sieve that’s used to drink mate.)
I guess you could say that mate for Argentinians (and Uruguayans, Paraguayans and other Latin Americans) is more than just a habit. It’s a cultural norm, or maybe you could even consider it an addiction—a habit on steroids. But as I walk around the city and observe this ritual in action, I started thinking—it’s not such a bad addiction to have. In fact, it’s quite healthy if you consider the social aspect (it’s sometimes called “the drink of friendship”), high level of antioxidants and nutrients, and other health benefits. Other cultures certainly have much unhealthier addictions, like smoking or excessive drinking.
As we near the end of 2019, there’s much talk about what changes we’d like to make in the coming year – toss out old habits, usher in new habits. New Year’s Eve is nearly synonymous with New Year’s Resolutions, but we often joke about how quickly those resolutions are tossed to the wayside. Our commitment to eliminating sugar or running twice a week becomes a vague memory by February.
I came across this article in the Atlantic in which the writer explains his (failed) new year’s resolution—to start every day by reading a poem—and how this ritual allowed him to sit with the work of poet Mary Oliver. He writes: “The exhortations that filled her poems became my command: ‘To pay attention, this is our endless and proper work.’” In his essay, he meditates on the many ways that modern technologies hijack our attention, and asserts that “the costs of allowing our attention to be commandeered remain drastically understated.”
Bad habits are formed by subconscious patterns that are reinforced over time. I can say personally that I’ve developed quite a few bad habits when it comes to my phone. But then again, that’s not very surprising when I reflect on how little consciousness and restraint I use when it comes to my relationship to this device.
Maybe you’re like me and wish you’d spend a little less time scrolling through Instagram or refreshing your Twitter feed. Maybe you wish you didn’t reach for your phone during a quiet moment that might otherwise be a time for reflection or daydreaming. Maybe you wish you connected more with people personally rather than via texts and tweets.
Bad habits are hard to break—but not impossible! Research shows that the best way to replace a bad habit is by adopting a better habit to replace it. Get in the habit of leaving your phone in the car when you go grocery shopping or to a doctor’s appointment. Slip a book into your purse instead. Put your phone in the trunk to avoid texting and driving. Listen to a book on tape instead. Give your hands something else to do—knitting, playing an instrument, drawing. Adopt a weekly technology sabbath and join a dodgeball league or volunteer at an animal shelter to distract yourself from the loneliness. Get crazy, like I did back in 2017, and start a yearlong social media sabbatical. You’ll be surprised how this might shake up your personal relationships—and your world.
If, like Mary Oliver says, “Attention is the beginning of devotion,” then think about how much attention—and devotion—you are giving to your device. Where might your attention better serve you? What altar do you wish to devote yourself to in the new year: friendship, service, poetry, art, Facebook?
Tip of the Week
My partner and I spent a few days in Miami before heading to Buenos Aires, and we realized that we'd left our camera back home in San Juan. I know that smartphones have such great cameras nowadays, but I'm a huge believer in having separate devices for distinct necessities. So off we went to purchase another camera. This way, we don't always need to have our phone on hand while we're on vacation!
Digital Life Around the Web
I'm on vacation so not hanging out much around the web these days. Please feel free to send me any good articles you come across!
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